What could be easier than introducing yourself in English and engaging in a little, very basic, small talk? It’s a topic covered in the very first unit of many business English books. Yet I notice that these seemingly simple exchanges can cause problems for non-native-speakers. Perhaps because the expressions used here are set phrases which allow little variation.
So let’s go back to basics to make absolutely sure that you’re saying the right thing.
How do you do? vs. How are you?
How do you do is very formal and rather old-fashioned, so basically you can delete it from your active vocabulary. 🙂
But what do you reply, when you meet someone for the first time and they say How do you do? They are not asking about your health or how you feel. So the answer is not Fine, thanks. Crazy as it may sound, How do you do? is a set greeting phrase and the reply is How do you do?
If someone wants to know how you are they’ll ask: How are you? or How are you doing? And then you can answer Fine, thanks. And you?
Nice to meet you or Nice to see you?
Nice to meet you is something you should only say when you meet a person for the first time. It’s like the German ‘Freut mich Sie kennenzulernen’ (and a much more up-to-date alternative to How do you do?).
If you’ve already had contact with the person by email or on the phone you could say Nice to meet you in person at last.
However, if you say Nice to meet you to someone you’ve already met, they may think you’ve forgotten them. Use Nice to see you (again) instead (German: ‘Schön, Sie wiederzusehen‘) .
Remember the agreement rule
Imagine that someone starts a conversation about the weather by saying Cold today, isn’t it? You know it’s 10 degrees colder in your home city, so you say It’s much colder in Berlin.
To British ears this sounds abrupt, it’s as if there’s something missing. This is because you’re ignoring an important principle: in Britain you’re expected to agree with this sort of statement. Often people do it by using a synonym, for example (Absolutely) freezing!
If you want to point out that it’s nowhere near as cold as it is in your home city, you can do so after this initial agreement Freezing and it’s even colder in Berlin!
Be sure to bear these three points in mind for the preliminaries and then you can move on to other small talk topics.
By the way, if there are other expressions which you are unsure how to respond to, feel free to ask me in the comments section.
